Because after I chose my word for this year (which is the first year I have done this, so I'm way behind on this concept) I found out that Heather had already picked this as her word! But I begged and pleaded (well, I left a comment on her blog) asking if I too could use this word and she very generously did not accuse me of copying and said it was fine.
I worry a lot obviously.
ANYWAYS. My word for this year is:
(I only made this because I really really love woodstamp. loooooove it.)
Yep. Focus.
I have the worst time focusing on anything. I'm the girl who has so many tabs up on her computer she has to open another window so that way she can fill that one up with tabs. I open things and then go to something else. And that's just one example of my issues with this. ha.
My head usually feels like a fuzzball. And if I really truly need to focus on something.... it bothers me. It's hard. I struggle and my head gets more fuzzy. I know a lot of it comes from this digital age we all live in, but at the same time, a lot of it is just bad habits I've taught myself.
my mind always feels like it's on 15 topics at once. like right now, I just went over to my email and started replying to something and I had to tell myself to get back to blogging. And I can just feel my brain resisting... if I'm not working on three things at once THEN I'm confused. yikes.
My choice was up in the air for quite a while, really up until yesterday because I was also considering the word "confidence". But I really really do struggle with focus and I can't worry about having the confidence to do things if I can't focus enough on anything anyways!!
I spent yesterday at borders, just browsing. That place calms me so much it's crazy (what?). I found this book:
Find Your Focus Zone and thumbed through it. Looks like a great book, reviews online are very good and I'm excited to have a place to start!
For awhile, and still some days... I get quite pissed about the state of myself. I want to point fingers and find someone to fix me. But I am the only one who can help myself. I am the one who has to fight for MY life. I have to be the change.
So now, it's time to focus.
xo.
